Breakups are hard, but with good friends at your side–it gets easier
Grown-ish last ended with Zoey (Yara Shahidi) having a broken heart. Zoey and Cash (Da’Vinchi) broke up three weeks ago, and Zoey has decided to get over her heartbreak by lying in bed scarfing down Doritos and watching “sad ass white lady” movies. She’s taking the break up hard but her friends are not going to let her wallow any longer. Ana (Francia Raisa), Jazz (Chloe Bailey), Sky (Halle Bailey), and Nomi (Emily Arlook) come to take Zoey out for the night! They turn on the music, pick out an outfit for her, and start pouring the drinks. Once they’re all ready to go, they try to snap a selfie, but the power goes out. The gang is stuck in for the night and Zoey, already back in her sweatpants, isn’t upset about it. Stuck in the dorms, the girls pull out the candles and sit around to talk. They’re all telling Zoey she needs to get over Cash by giving her some advice. Ana tells her story of getting over her first love but it doesn’t get taken seriously because she was dating her cousin. It’s harder for Zoey to get over Cash because she has to constantly see his face every day and she doesn’t really understand why they ended. So, the girls try to get Zoey to think of all the bad things about Cash so that she can stop viewing him as the perfect guy. They find out she’s still been talking to Cash and tell her it’s counterproductive in getting over their breakup.
Aaron (Trevor Jackson) shows up with wine and a candle at Zoey’s dorm but he wasn’t expecting all the other girls to be there. They let him join in on the discussion and end up talking about how guys handle breakups versus girls. Zoey and Aaron end up having a private conversation that leads to him revealing that Cash is hooking up with Zoe Kravitz. She debates on whether or not to call and tell him exactly how she feels about it and eventually comes to the conclusion that it wouldn’t be a good idea. Now that she’s deleted his number, she can finally begin to move on. “Un-Break My Heart” was a success in getting Zoey to get over her ex but it got us thinking, so let’s discuss some more of the episode!
Here to discuss the ins and outs of breakups is our Grown-ish roundtable!
Jeria (@jereyea) – Student, Stan, and Tweeter
Aima (@ASAPAIMA) – Music lover and poetry trash
Ryan (@legendarylevy) – child actor, TV & movie buff
Miya (@MsMiya_) – Writer, Film Enthusiast, Singer.
Chi (@polyhansen) – college student, free writer, pop media enthusiast, practice in promotion and sales.
1. What was your favorite moment?
Jeria (@jereyea): My favorite moment was the end of the episode when Zoey was completely out of the funk and danced it out with her friends.
Aima (@ASAPAIMA): When Aaron came in with the wine and candle, I was laughing so much.
Ryan (@legendarylevy): Can I have two moments, ‘cause I’m picking two. When Zoey was watching her friends and decided to delete Cash’s number from her phone. Such a beautiful moment. Also, when Aaron showed up with a bottle and a candle and Zoey wasn’t even there. The girls calling him out on it and Vivek behind him doing the same thing was a hilarious moment I enjoyed it.
Miya (@MsMiya_): My favorite moment, was the little dance montage at the end. It was cute and just made me really happy!
Chi (@polyhansen): My favorite from this episode was the ending, it was such a relief seeing Zoey get past her breakup. I was rooting for it the whole episode, so when she finally deleted the number and let loose with her friends, I felt that energy!
2. Zoey was wallowing big time. Were her dramatics accurate of how people feel after a big breakup?
Jeria: When she said, “Not to be dramatic, but I feel like I’m dying.”, I felt that.
Aima: I have had a terrible breakup and I feel Zoey. It was so accurate. She deserves to feel that way and act that way, it was an accurate reaction of how people feel after a big breakup.
Ryan: It’s pretty accurate. The laying in bed watching shows, eating, and feeling like they are dying. I don’t know about not washing your hair for 3 weeks though, that is pretty serious!
Miya: I’m not sure. Everyone deals with breakups differently, but I do feel like there were parts to her dramatics that people could relate to.
Chi: I think that is how most people, mainly women, are after a heartbreak. This was someone who took her virginity and someone who she was going to plan her whole life around, so I don’t think she was too dramatic. Anyone, male or female, who goes through something like that will have some type of meltdown, it just depends on the person.
3. Did you have a flashback moment to when your friends had to pull you out of some kind of funk when they had the little scene of getting Zoey ready to go out?
Jeria: I’ve had moments when my friends picked me up for us to go to the movies or do something fun because I wasn’t in the mood. It worked.
Aima: I remember my friends telling me to stop crying over my ex and to be happy. I feel like I related to Zoey at that point.
Ryan: Yes, I have had friends drag me out of the house after a breakup. The scene of them getting Zoey ready to go out was hilarious because of how fast she got back in bed.
Miya: Haha! Yes, I have been in situations where my friends were trying to get me to feel better. That scene brought back a lot of memories.
Chi: For me, personally, I like to go through my funks alone, so my friends know not to bother me or try to force me out. I think it’s healthy to just sit alone, in your room and just feel whatever you need to feel. It’s Emotional Intelligence 101, you don’t always have to smother your feelings with parties, friends etc. As you can see in the episode, they never got to go to a party they just sat and talked it out with alcohol and sometimes, that works too!
4. What advice would you have given Zoey to get through her first heartbreak?
Jeria: I would tell Zoey to end all contact with him as soon as possible because keeping in contact with him for a day will soon turn into a week and that week will turn into 3 years.
Aima: I would have told her to delete his number, don’t text back, turn off his text notifications, and to do what she used to enjoy before dating Cash. It is okay to cry, she needs to know that it will take time.
Ryan: With or without someone, you deserve to be happy.
Miya: I would have told Zoey, to take all the time she needs, but also I would have told her not to let this break-up define or consume her.
Chi: Me, being the blunt person that I am, would’ve informed her that it may be her first heartbreak, but it won’t be her last and that she should use her situation as a learning opportunity. Like the twins said, these dudes are wild out here (but using the same vernacular as them of course).
5. Zoey tried to keep in touch with Cash after their break-up. Do you think it’s a good idea to stay in touch with your ex?
Jeria: It’s a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad idea to keep in contact with your ex because it makes it easier for him to manipulate you, and a way for him to keep you without the commitment.
Aima: Maybe 1-3 months after the breakup and you are extremely sure you are over them. It’s good not to hold grudges. (Unless they are abusers or cheaters!)
Ryan: I don’t see a problem with keeping in touch with an ex. Although, after a breakup, some people may need some time not talking to move on. If you’re breaking up and still contacting each other, it can be emotionally stressful holding on to something that is changing.
Miya: I think it depends on the nature of the relationship and how serious it was. Again, it’s all about perspective and it’s different for everyone.
Chi: NO. It is never, I repeat, never a good idea to keep in contact with your ex especially if the relationship ended as tragically as Zoey’s did. All it does is bring up old feelings that cause more stress, and that’s not good. Stressing ages you!
6. Who thought that daydream moment was real with Zoey and Cash?
Jeria: I thought the daydream was real, and I was like “don’t fall into his trap again, sis! You’re a strong black woman that doesn’t need a man.”
Aima: I HONESTLY DID! I was like “Zoey, DO NOT go back to that man!”
Ryan: During it, I was trying to process it all – Cash being with another person and coming to talk to Zoey. I was questioning if Cash with the other Zoe was a ploy to get Zoey back and then, I realized it was a daydream. It felt like a better outcome/moment for Zoey to not call him. I’m kind of glad Cash coming to see Zoey was a daydream.
Miya: Omg! I was ready to throw my computer, but it was such a relief to find out it wasn’t real. I kept thinking, Zoey wouldn’t be that easy to get back.
Chi: I definitely thought it was real and I was slightly upset and slightly excited, which is a weird combination.
7. Do you think Zoey is finally giving the guys up for a little while to focus on her friendships and school?
Jeria: Zoey will be back to dealing with Aaron by next week’s episode.
Aima: No, I do not think so, at all. I think she is going to go to Aaron again.
Ryan: I think Zoey really liked Cash so she won’t be focused on guys at the moment.
Miya: I think for right now maybe, but I feel like eventually, she will get back on the dating train!
Chi: I don’t think Zoey is giving up on guys at all. However, I do believe she is going to shift her focus more to accomplishing what she is in college to accomplish and that’s always good. That’s not to say that she won’t be having some fun on the side – hey, that’s what college is for. It’s all about balance, and if Aaron keeps trying to shoot his shot, she may give in a little.
A night filled with great friends, great music, and breakup rules gives Zoey a chance to power through her heartbreak.
Zoey started the episode out in a rough moment, but with the help of her friends, she got through it. We’ve all experienced what she was going through or at the least have had our friends have to help us out of a funk. Jazz and Sky brought some humor into the episode, and Aaron had some really funny lines and facial expressions– well done on Trevor Jackson’s part. We’re mostly in agreement with the scene where Aaron shows up at the dorm and the dance montage at the end being our favorite moments of the episode. It was nice to see the gang have a silly moment after the depressing last couple weeks Zoey has had.
The music selection for this episode set the mood up well. One of the songs, “Nighttime”, is by Grown-ish’s own Trevor Jackson. We found ourselves enjoying the change in music coinciding with the change in tone. It gave the episode a great feel. We’re also glad we got to learn a little bit more about some of the characters – Ana dated her cousin and Vivek (Jordan Buhat) sweats and cries to get through his breakups. It’s nice getting little tidbits about the characters as the series moves on.
Zoey gets herself into a bind when she reveals too much on social media next week. We’re ready to see how they show tackles the use of social media because it has already been a big part of the show. We can’t wait to discuss how Zoey and her friends get through it!